1)
FEDERAL EXPRESS IS NOW
CALLED FEDEX. WHEN I RETIRE I´LL BE A FEDEX EX. BUT IF I´M AN OFFICER WHEN I
RETIRE, I´LL BE AN EX FEDEX EXEC. THEN AFTER A DIVORCE, MY EX-WIFE WILL BE AN
EX FEDEX EXEC´S EX. IF I REJOIN FEDEX IN TIME , I´D BE AN EX EX FEDEX EXEC. WHEN
WE REMARRY, MY WIFE WILL BE AN EX EX FEDEX EXEC´S EX.
2)
ADMISDT THE MISTS AND
COLDEST FROSTS, WITH STOUTEST WRISTS AND LOUDEST BOASTS, HE THRUSTS HIS FISTS
AGAINST THE POSTS, AND STILL INSISTS HE SEES THE GHOSTS.
3)
THERE ONCE WAS A MAN WHO
HAD A SISTER, HIS NAME WAS MR.FISTER. MR.FISTER´S SISTER SOLD SEA SHELLS BY THE
SEA SHORE. MR.FISTER DIDN´T SELL SEA SHELLS, HE SOLD SILK SHEETS. MR.FISTER
TOLD HIS SISTER THAT HE SOLD SIX SILK SHEETS TO SIX SHIEKS. THE SISTER OF
MR.FISTER SAID I SOLD SIX SHELLS TO SIX SHIEKS TOO!
4)
TERRY TEETER, A
TEETER-TOTTER TEACHER, TAUGHT HER DAUGHTER TARA TO TEETER-TOTTER, BUT TARA
TEETER DIDN´T TEETER-TOTTER AS TERRY TEETER TAUGHT HER TO.
5)
THE LEITH POLICE
DISMISSETH US. THEY THOUGHT WE SOUGHT TO STAY. THE LEITH POLICE DISMISSETH US.
THEY THOUGHT WE´D STAY ALL DAY. THE LEITH POLICE DISMISSETH US, WE BOTH SIGHED
SIGHS APIECE, AND THE SIGHS THAT WE SIGHED AS WE SAID GOODBYE, WERE THE SIZE OF
THE LEITH POLICE.
6)
KANTAI CAN TIE A TIE. IF
KANTAI CAN TIE A TIE, WHY CAN´T I TIE A TIE LIKE KANTAI CAN TIE A TIE?
7)
HOW MUCH MYRTLE WOULD A
WOOD TURTLE HURDLE IF A WOOD TURTLE COULD HURDLE MYRTLE? A WOOD TURTLE WOULD
HURDLE AS MUCH MYRTLE AS A WOOD TURTLE COULD HURDLE IF A WOOD TURTLE COULD
HURDLE MYRTLE.
8)
HOW MANY BERRIES COULD A
BARE BERRY CARRY, IF A BARE BERRY COULD CARRY BERRIES? WELL, THEY CAN´T CARRY
BERRIES (WHICH COULD MAKE YOU VERY WARY) BUT A BARE BERRY CARRIED IS MORE
SCARY!
9)
ESAU WOOD SAWED WOOD.
ALL THE WOOD ESAU WOOD SAW, ESAU WOOD WOULD SAW. ALL THE WOOD WOOD SAW, ESAU
SOUGHT TO SAW. ONE DAY, ESAU WOOD´S WOOD-SAW WOULD SAW NO WOOD. SO ESAU WOOD
SOUGHT A NEW WOOD-SAW. THE NEW WOOD-SAW WOULD SAW WOOD. OH, THE WOOD ESAU WOOD
WOULD SAW. ESAU SOUGHT A SAW THAT WOULD SAW WOOD AS NO OTHER WOOD-SAW WOULD
SAW. AND ESAU FOUND A SAW THAT WOULD SAW AS NO OTHER WOOD-SAW WOULD SAW. AND
ESAU WOOD SAWED WOOD.
10) THREE
GREY GEESE IN A GREEN FIELD GRAZING, GREEN WERE THE GEESE AND GREEN WAS THE
GRAZING.
11)
RAY RAG RAN ACROSS A
ROUGH ROAD. ACROSS A ROUGH ROAD RAY RAG RAN. WHERE IS THE ROUGH ROAD RAY RAG
RAN ACROSS?
12)
A FLEA AND A FLY IN A
FLUE, WERE IMPRISONED. SO WHAT COULD THEY DO? SAID THE FLY, LET US FREE. SAID
THE FLEA, LET US FLY. SO THEY FLEW THROUGH A FLAW IN THE FLUE.
13)
HASSOCK HASSOCK, BLACK
SPOTTED HASSOCK. BLACK SPOT ON A BLACK BACK OF A BLACK SPOTTED HASSOCK.
14)
I STOOD SADLY ON THE
SILVER STEPS OF BURGESS´S FISH SAUCE SHOP, MIMICKING HIM HICCUPING, AND WILDLY
WELCOMING HIM WITHIN.
15)
A ROUGH-COATED,
DOUGH-FACED, THOUGHTFUL PLOUGHMAN STRODE THROUGH THE STREETS OF SCARBOROUGH,
AFTER FALLING INTO A SLOUGH, HE COUGHDED AND HICCOUGHED.
16)
FRED THRELFALL´S
THIRTY-FIVE FINE THREADS ARE FINER THREADS THAN FRED THRELFALL´S THIRTY-FIVE
THICK THREADS.
17)
TRICK TRISTAN TRACKED A
TRAIL OF TINY TURTLES. HOW MANY TINY TURTLES DID TRICKY TRISTAN TRACK? TRICKY
TRISTAN TRACKED TWENTY TWO TINY TURTLES, THAT´S HOW MANY TINY TURTLES TRICKY
TRISTAN TRACKED?
18)
HOW MANY RATS WOULD THE
RUSKIES ROAST IF THE RUSKIES COULD ROAST RATS? HOW MANY CATS WOULD A CADDIE
CATCH IF A CADDIE COULD CATCH CATS?
19) WHAT
DID YOU HAVE FOR BREAKFAST? – RUBBER BALLS AND LIQUOR! WHAT DID YOU HAVE FOR
LUNCH? – RUBBER BALLS AND LIQUOR! WHAT DID YOU HAVE FOR DINNER? – RUBBER BALLS
AND LIQUOR! WHAT DO YOU DO WHEN YOUR SISTER COMES HOME? – RUBBER BALLS AND
LIQUOR!
20) THRIFTY
THEOPHILUS, THE THEOCRATIC THISTLE SIFTER, THRICE THRUST THREE THOUSAND
THISTLES THROUGH THE SLICK THICK OF HIS SOFTLY THROBBING THUMB.
